Afternoon Coffee.

I don't want to think about it,
I don't want to talk about it...
I am so confused about it.

Thanks JT, that is sort of how I feel about it.

Yesterday was spent in Topeka with my friend Megs. I tried Indian food for the first time. I was indifferent to it, neither liked nor disliked it. I really wanted Vietnamese, however, it is always good to try new things.

Topeka's Salvation Army is disappointing  I felt like we walked into a time warp, I guess all thrift stores are like that but I just expected more I suppose.

TJ Max was just as disappointing when it came to clothes. I only found a pair of sandals, some conditioner  spices and coffee. 80% of what I got was edible.

A bit underwhelming for a shopping trip, oh well (insert shoulder shrug.) I was feeling big and bloated and a bit bloody :S

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Last week, was filled with lots of work, 60 hrs and 5 min worth. It was a LONG week. Everyone had a long week.

Nico got into a car accident last Sunday night. He was fine other than bruises and some swelling. He couldn't work till Thursday so we were a bit short staffed in the prep area.

Derek, Sho, Alex, and Marcus had quite the time too. It was hard on us all.

I can't wait till Katie goes back up front or out the door. She is not a very good team player.

I learned something about myself last week when I was training one new utility/dish guy, Juan, he is from Acapulco. He used to work at Olive Garden, speaks a very little english, and asked if I had a novio, boyfriend.
I said, "yes, he is in Mexico."
He said, "oh, for school."
"Ha, no."
"Oh, working?"
"Si"
"He American right?"
"no."
"He's Mexicano?"
"si."
"He school or no school?"
"No school."
"He restaraunt o lawn?"
"restaurant."
He stopped dusting and just looked me over and said, "lo que una mujer hermosa (what a beautiful woman)."

I told him he used to work at Olive garden and he knew who Jorge was, he then asked when he was coming back..."no se (I don't know)."

Working with Juan, struggling to understand yet learning so much from each other. It was fulfilling. I felt like I could climb mount everest after I got done working with him. It was so much fun showing him how things worked and went. I think dad was right when he said I always wanted to be a teacher. But I don't want to teach people who take learning for granted. I think, I want to teach and learn from people who have been passed over and dismissed. Juan is not stupid or slow, he just doesn't speak very much English. NBD, patience is key, as well as, persistence, and being willing to let yourself make mistakes and sound like a fool while butchering their language. It was fun. It has been awhile since I have had fun at work.

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These last couple of days I have been thinking about my future and what it holds and what I want it to hold. I feel like I need to have a talk with Jorge. I am not sure what the future holds, but what I do know is that, I want him in it. I want to have a family. I want a kiss good morning and a kiss goodnight. I want to live and laugh, cook and get messy. I want to fight and make up. I want to smile and catch the tears as they fall with my hand. I want to be there for successes and failures. I want to learn something new everyday. I want to paint. I want to just live and worrying about all the future mess is not helping me live and be happy today. So dismiss yourself, ugly thoughts.

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I work at 4:30 so I am going to go get ready. I am going to text my honey and tell him I love him, just like I am going to tell you all, SMILE because I LOVE YOU TOO :)


-B