Dreamcatcher.

The good will pass on through, while the evil is captured in the web, where it will perish in the light of the morning sun.

I think I want to make a dreamcatcher. I have been having some not so nice dreams lately. Not that everyone has to believe in them, I like the idea that the evil will perish in the light of the morning sun, sort of romantic, huh?

So much has happened:

Cano invited me out to dinner as "just friends," HA! It went from fun and light conversation --> I want to marry you, meet your parents, move to Chicago, have children in two years. Ha, it makes me laugh how I get myself into situations, sometimes.

I switched my birth control and I am a much happier person, less moody and angry about life. Who knew.

Grad School is not in my stars at RIT, New York. oh well. I would like more time to research and find a perfect fit before I go 40,000+ in debt...I need to send the advisor an email. Along with Dan and Nancy, telling them to save those recommendations. I just, it was just too soon.

I don't think I am moving out of Manhattan at least for another year....that is if I can find a place. I am looking hardcore but it is proving a bit difficult...

A am going through some friend breakups I guess (shoulder shrug) I never knew they had a problem with me until I got messages in the form of texts and in my BFA book of all places.
...LE SIGH....
I just wish people's mom and dad were more like mine. I mean, Dad would say, ""you'll never know it in thirty years," and mom would say, "get a life, it takes two to tango."

I have always said communication is a two way street. I understand life gets crazy hectic and busy for everyone, but if you don't seek me out when you need me, I will most likely stay aloof until I need you. So when you don't call me up and say you need me I assume you are fine and living your life day to day, just like me because when I need you I seek you out. Apparently that is wrong...again (shoulder shrug) my bad.

I know who my real friends are. They don't keep tabs and understand shit happens and when we need each other we just need to call. The End.

I have another apartment showing at 2:15. I need to write emails. Start going through stuff. Take some stuff to the Goodwill.

I want a maxi dress and a new swim suit.

Jorge and I are talking again. NO, not back together, I just think he needs a friend. Megan has already informed me that this is unhealthy, but I think I have known for awhile we would never work out. I have been through my angry/ grieving process and have moved on. He apologized and I  forgave him. We both needed those things. Now the road is clear to just be friends. In the end we both want each other to be happy.

So last week, Ben made this joke that kind of rubbed me the wrong way.
Jeff and I were prepping in the back and Ben walks up to me and asks me if I am a good sport about jokes. I told him depends, but usually yes. He then proceeds to ask Jeff why Mexico doesn't have a male Olympic team? Jeff just shrugs his shoulders and asks idk why? Ben then goes, because all of the Mexican men are in Bridget's bed.

Yep, funny, huh?

I just don't understand, he is into blonds with big boobs and that is acceptable, but I cannot be attracted to hard working, dark haired men? huh, ok...cool.

So that is where we stand.

I miss my Scote-dawg. Made fruit pizza and ate it like we both were here :)

Love, B